When your ex will not cooperate

"My ex isn't paying the property settlement, support, or reimbursements — what can I do?" We hear it constantly, from clients and from family law attorneys. The retirement account is often the most collectible asset a non-compliant party owns, and California gives the family court broad power to reach it. Here's the playbook, condensed from our ACFLS article (full PDF here).

2025 update: the Court of Appeal's DeBenedetti & Ensburg decision expanded QDROs further still — they can now enforce fiduciary-breach awards, not just division and support obligations. Read our article on the ruling.

Step 1 — Find the money

Every private ERISA plan files an IRS Form 5500, searchable for free through the Department of Labor — with the plan name, administrator, and contact information. Free account-locator services can identify third-party administrators like Fidelity. And if an account was never disclosed in the divorce at all, Family Code §2556 gives the court continuing jurisdiction to divide omitted community assets by post-judgment motion — with the possibility of a far harsher result for intentional concealment.

Step 2 — Freeze the money

A Family Code §755 notice of adverse interest, served on the plan, puts the administrator on the hook if it pays out afterward (In re Marriage of Baker). Practitioners who rely only on joinders should know the limits: 401(k) plans live under federal ERISA law, and an administrator can disregard a joinder under federal preemption — Judicial Council Form FL-318-INFO's own chart carves 401(k)s out of the joinder requirement. The §755 notice is the tool that reaches them. Our freeze guide covers this from the client's perspective.

Step 3 — Enter the QDRO without another hearing

In most counties, an order enforcing an existing judgment does not require a noticed motion — you are not asking for a new order, you are asking the court to enforce one it already made (Family Code §2610; California Rule of Court 5.2(g); In re Marriage of Bowen (2001) 91 Cal.App.4th 1291). Some counties have codified the procedure, including entry over a non-cooperative party's silence after notice and an objection window. Where a judicial officer insists on a hearing anyway, the extra cost itself becomes part of the remedy — see step 4.

Step 4 — Make non-compliance expensive

Enforcement only works if it's worth pursuing. Two strategies change the economics: attorney fees for enforcing the order can be added on top and charged against the non-compliant party through the QDRO itself, and in cases of egregious concealment, the court can be asked to award up to the entire undisclosed asset. A party gambling on non-cooperation should understand the downside is not "delay" — it's paying for the privilege.

We prepare enforcement and support-collection QDROs, adverse interest notices, and omitted asset divisions — and we coordinate with family law counsel where a motion is required. If your judgment is being ignored, the account is usually still reachable.